All Cheerleaders Die


Rah, rah, rah? More like blah, blah, blah, retch.

OK, All Cheerleaders Die, this year’s Midnight Madness opener, certainly isn’t boring. It’s just a whole lot confusing and disrespectful towards its title characters.

Technically there’s not much to the plot, which follows a high school girl who sets out to avenge her cheerleader friend’s death by infiltrating the squad. But when the flick does attempt to bring in what could have been a slightly interesting, slightly empowering (albeit repetitive) twist, the technicality behind it is not explained. At all. We’re just supposed to accept what’s thrust in front of faces, just as the cheer girls are to do with the evil jocks’ dicks.

On that note, if you’re looking for the next faux feminist exploitation horror flick, All Cheerleaders is for you. Sure, we get to see some girls get back at some honestly misogynist guys, but the lens through which they are presented is almost just as voyeuristic. The girls are tarted up in skin-tight ensembles throughout, their butts and boobs nearly bursting out the seams. And there is a lot of girl-on-girl action, but none of the relationships or characters are given enough time to truly develop, so the scenes come across like frantic, deleted sequences from a bad porno.

I’m really disheartened knowing that Lucky McKee, the man who brought us May, one of the most genuinely frightening and touching female-driven horror films of recent years, could sink to such a low.  I’ve been one of his biggest cheerleaders and now I’m considering throwing down my pom poms for good.


All Cheerleaders Die screens Sunday, Sept. 15 (9:30 p.m., Scotiabank 11).


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